Masters of Horror: Jenifer
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Another MASTERS OF HORROR looked at today, and I have to say, another great additional to an already strong disk season. Today I'm talking about the great Dario Argento's JENIFER. I was quite eager to watch this one because of Steven Weber. I am a huge fan of this actor. Loved him in WINGS, loved him in SOUR GRAPES, and loved him in Mick Garrison's take on THE SHINING. He never seems to be in a plethora of films, so it was good seeing him in this short film. I have to admit though, after watching this I don't think that I will look at my man Weber again.

Written to screen from Steven Weber himself, from a story first shown in a CREEPIE comic, and directed by Argento- JENIFER is as twisted, gory, and oddly kinky as a movie could be. This is a twisted one folks. Damn. That's right, I say damn.

On a lunch break police detective Frank Spivey (Weber) hears a young girl's screams. Running, he sees a demented looking man dragging a bound, young woman down the bank. With a butcher knife in hand he obviously is in the process of slicing up the poor girl. With no intention of stopping, even with the warnings of gun drawn Spivey, he is shot down. While leaning over to check the body of the man, the would be killer comes alive to whisper one word to Spivey; "Jenifer." Not thinking much of it, the good detective unties this "Jenifer" and then gets a good look at her. Damn, is this woman ugly. He takes her back to the station and everything is fine. Well, not exactly.

Coming home he can't seem to get the woman out of his mind. Why he can't get her out of his mind, I just don't know. Hell, he even pictures Jenifer as he is trying to do his wife.

Quick Description Break: To know what Jenifer is, think Jodie Foster in Nell except being inbred about 25 times over. Take that inbred girl and toss her out of an airplane into a forest full of ugly trees. Then make sure that she smacks face first into every single branch of those trees. As the girl hits the ground after all this, just to be 100% accurate, tear off one of the ugly braches and proceed to smack her upside the face until tired. This will give you a good idea of this woman's face. Well, envision all that or just look at the box art. And on a side note, neither Rufus nor Bumscorner.com endorse the beating of women of any kind. This was all metaphor sick people.

Finding out that since she can't speak, has no past and is one ugly ass woman, she has been taken to an insane asylum until the state can figure out what to do with her. The good Spivey can't stand to see the poor girl there, removes her and takes her to his house to stay. Well, this doesn't go well when Frank wakes up to find her ugly mug naked in his room. This doesn't sit well for his wife either. To make matters worse Jenifer is then caught eating the family's pet cat. The wife and her son of course leave the house. Now if I was Spivey I think I would have left also. Instead, being infatuated with the woman's sexual appetite and body, stays at the house with Jenifer.

Soon Frank's mental state goes down the toilet, but he just can't get rid of Jenifer no matter what she does. Something's gotta give.

Now the story brought up many memories for me. See I, as a man, have slept with a few hot bodied women with horrible faces. This is the nature of being a male, and single. My father had great wisdom when he sat me on his knee when I was little and told me, "They all look good on last call. You'll understand someday son." Wiser words have never been spoken. Now, JENIFER was the extreme of this. Jenifer, played to silent but brilliant perfection by THE TOOTH FAIRY's Carrie Fleming, is a rabid animal with an uncontrollable lust for Frank Spivey. Jenifer's simplicity, passion and love that she shows without saying a word makes her carnage almost less brutal. Almost like a dog that is only doing what it knows, and doesn't understand what is wrong with what it has done. The odd part of this film, that truly will make the men watching uncomfortable, is that the viewer will think about what he would do in that situation. Me? Well, I would be all for it in the situation (I am weak) until the bloodshed and carnage began. That would be my cue to leave. Speaking of carnage, boy is there some here.

Cats, carnies and even little kids aren't safe from Jenifer's animal instincts. Out of all of the MASTERS OF HORROR that I have seen this one is the most intense when it comes to the bloodshed and gut chomping. Hell, even if this movie was in the theaters I think it would be waaaay too intense for the MPAA. Even you gore hounds out there might squirm a bit. I know I did on a couple of scenes.

Overall, Argento gives us a short movie that is beautiful in look and direction, and brutal as hell in execution. This movie is both overly erotic, at times causing some uncomfortable moments, and then it just slaps you in the face with it's intense violence. Argento walks a fine line that treads perfectly between the two. Steven Weber does a great job, both in the writing department and acting, and I can't compliment Carrie Fleming enough. While the last half of the film slowed things down a bit and seemed to last slightly longer than it should have, this is an easy 4 1/2 can purchase that I will watch again and again. Well, maybe not again and again. Looooong showers are needed in between each viewing.

Added:  Monday, August 14, 2006

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